An idea came to my mind just before I took the stage to lead the Lag Ba’omer celebration in Bangkok.
I asked for two brothers and two sisters to come to the stage.
The kids were eager to be ‘stars’ on stage. More than seven pairs of siblings came up.
I asked them each to introduce themselves.
‘Do you ever fight with your sibling’? I asked them. Six out of seven admitted that they did.
Then I asked them all collectively, ‘do you still love your sibling even though you admitted that you sometimes fight’?
A loud resounding YES was the response.
I rest my case.
As kids we figure out how to fight yet remain connected as one family.
It behooves us to retain that innate knowledge as we get older.
I will say it in even stronger terms.
Being different is not a ‘bug’ in humanity. It is a ‘feature’.
Hashem created us all looking different.
And he created us all thinking differently.
Each of us has our own nuanced personality.
Let us figure out how to stay unified.
The Jewish people are likened to one collective body.
Every part is irreplaceably critical to the whole.
Nu, so what more motivation do we need to agree to disagree respectfully and lovingly.
This is exactly what Lag Ba’omer teaches us.
The students of Rabbi Akiva stopped dying. The plague that took so many thousands of them was precipitated by their intolerance towards each other. The plague stopped, which means that they got the point.
Sometimes or shall I say oftentimes, it is a small thing that can create conflict between people. The small thing grows and expands in our minds and hearts and sometimes even degenerates to all out fighting.
Think of someone you don’t talk to, or whom you avoid.
Think of the origins of that feeling.
Is it all that big an issue?
On a sidenote, I am not minimizing small issues.
Small issues can be HUGE issues when you trace them.
One of the headlines that jumped out at me in the last few weeks are the incidences of radar outages between the flight control towers and the aircraft that are flying in the air. It is frightening to think about. Pilots need guidance by air traffic controllers to stay in their flight path and land safely. May Hashem protect us.
Apparently, one of the outages was traced back to a small copper wire which short-circuited caused a disruption to the radar communication system.
A small piece of wire is hardly of any financial value. If you saw it on the street, you wouldn’t bother picking it up.
However, when it is part of a sophisticated system controlling aircraft carrying hundreds of people it becomes priceless and critical beyond description.
That little ‘short circuit’ in your relationships with others may be much more significant than you imagined.
There is a very comprehensive multi-decade study about wellness and happiness that shares the formula for happiness as derived by researchers from tracking people’s lives.
The conclusion was simple.
Connection with other people, especially with spouse, family and community, is the surest way to long term happiness and wellness. Doing acts of kindness to those in need. Being nice to people you meet along your way. All of these things – simple and old fashioned as they may sound – are the paths to living happier and better material lives. So says the Harvard study.
As Jews who have the gift of the Torah, it does not come as a surprise at all.
We have known this for more than 3300 years. Since the Torah was given.
The Torah says, ‘love your fellow as yourself’. Rabbi Akiva taught that this precept is the main rule of the Torah’.
As Jews we know that the Torah way of life is the most natural expression for a Jew. And the healthiest too. Both physically and spiritually.
The Torah warns us against hatred and intolerance and forbids it. Cruelty and vindictiveness are likewise prohibited.
It thus follows that by staying away from fighting with others and instead by doing acts of kindness and compassion to others, you will be healthier and happier.
Lag Ba'omer is the day of the passing of the author of the Zohar. Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai.
From his perspective, the day of his passing was the day that he became bound up in oneness with G-d. He instructed that we celebrate this day. In honor of the great saintly sage, festive bonfires and celebrations are held throughout Israel and the world.
The Midrash tells a story about this holy sage:
Once there was a disciple of Rabbi Shimon’s who left the Holy Land and returned a wealthy man. The other disciples saw this and were envious and also wanted to leave. Rabbi Shimon knew of this. He took them to a valley facing Meron and said: “Valley! Valley! Become filled with gold coins!” The valley started flowing with gold coins before them.
Said Rabbi Shimon to his disciples: “If it is gold that you desire, here is gold; take it for yourselves. But know that whoever takes now is taking his portion of the World to Come. For the reward of Torah is only in the World to Come.” (Midrash Rabbah, Shemot 52:3)
Click here for the Rebbe’s teaching on this story.
It seems to me that there is a very basic lesson in this story.
Sometimes the short term ‘gold’ is at the expense of the long term ‘gold’.
The ‘quick fix’ may eventually prove to be a ‘long term glitch’.
Say for example you work so hard that you neglect caring for your loved ones. When you finally build your financial life to the point that you have time to spend on your loved ones, there may no longer be a viable relationship.
Sure, keeping the mitzvahs has its cost.
But ultimately the benefits, in this world and in the next world are infinitely more valuable when keeping Torah and Mitzvot.
And I want to ‘double-click’ on what I just said and expand the discussion regarding the benefits of keeping Torah as being the best way of life for every Jew.
It is not just in the next world that we will see how living a Torah life is the best investment. In this lifetime too. If you look from the perspective of several decades you will almost certainly see that the areas in which you followed G-d’s moral code of Torah and Mitzvahs, led to the most blessed parts of your life.
It makes perfect sense that doing the right thing leads to good results in our lives.
We believe in G-d as the creator of everything.
We believe that the Torah is G-d’s instruction book to the Jewish people (and through them to the world at large).
Since G-d is the creator of our material bodies, our nervous systems, our mental capacities and our souls, it is quite simple to recognize that the best possible life is to be had by following the ‘instruction manual’ i.e. the Torah.
It sounds simplistic.
How to live the best life? By following Hashem's path.
The truth is so true that it seems simple.
It is uncomplicated.
And at the same time in our sophisticated world, it sounds embarrassingly straightforward.
Which is why the first instruction we have in the Code of Jewish Law is ‘do not be embarrassed in the face of scoffing cynics’.
There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Embracing your deepest identity as a Jew will be the greatest source of blessing.
The Torah is our life.
The Torah is our strength.
Our strength, happiness and wellbeing emanate from our unity.
It’s a no-brainer. Let us get more ‘one’ with each other’
After the kids sat back down on their seats, I asked them to place their arms over the shoulders of their friends and sing together: ‘Hinei Mah Tov Umana’im Shevet Achim Gam Yachad’. ‘How good and pleasant it is when brothers sit together’.
Shabbat Shalom
Rabbi Yosef Kantor
P.S. in honor of the auspicious day of Lag Ba’omer we held a ‘parade’ and a bonfire at the Chabad House. The weather over the past few days in Bangkok has been heavy rains in the afternoon. Right now, as I am finishing to write my article on Friday afternoon, it is raining heavily.
Yesterday was an exception. For the duration of the day, all the way through the afternoon and eve of Lag Ba’omer we had inexplicably dry weather.
We felt so loved by Hashem as He shined His countenance upon us in the merit and honor the great and righteous Tzadik.