"Shabbat Shalom from Bangkok"

This week’s parsha of Vayelech ends with a promise made by Hashem that the Torah will never be forgotten by the Jewish People. 

The Talmud (Bava Metzia 85, b) tells about the great efforts of Rabbi Chiya in ensuring that the Torah not be forgotten. 

Rabbi Ḥiyya elaborated: What do I do to this end? I go and sow flax seeds and twine nets with the flax, and then I hunt deer and feed their meat to orphans. Next I prepare parchment from their hides and I write the five books of the Torah on them. I go to a city and teach five children the five books, one book per child, and I teach six other children the six orders of the Mishna, and I say to them: Until I return and come here, read each other the Torah and teach each other the Mishna. This is how I act to ensure that the Torah will not be forgotten by the Jewish people.

Last Friday night I shared the following similar story (without yet realizing the connection to the upcoming Parsha, thank you Hashem for showing me your detailed Divine Providence):

My wife’s paternal great grandfather R’ Chayim Yehuda risked his life in Soviet Russia to collect money to support the underground network of Lubavitch yeshivas. Literally he provided bread to the starving yeshiva boys so that they could continue studying Torah. 

When asked why he was risking arrest by the communist regime that was actively trying to stamp out Jewish religious life in Russia, he responded ‘I hope that in the merit of my supporting the study of Torah by the yeshiva boys, my own grandchildren will merit to be students in the yeshiva and study Torah’.

The Torah will not be forgotten by the Jewish People is a promise made by G-d. R’ Chayim Yehuda was actively making efforts that his own progeny would be part of that group who doesn’t forget Torah.

My father-in-law and his brother were those grandchildren he was talking about.

Indeed, against all odds, after losing their father who was drafted to the Russian army and sent to the front, their mother managed to escape Russia with them. They grew up to be yeshiva students and raise large Torah true Chassidic families.

(This story and many other twists and turns was recently printed in a riveting book about my wife’s late grandmother ‘I’m not Alone’)

The next day a woman came to my wife and told her that she was so deeply touched by the story that she could not get it off her mind all night.

‘Do you think I had an ancestor who prayed and did good deeds for their progeny that will spark Jewish observance in the heart and soul of my children’ she asked?

My wife shared this feedback with her father. Her father responded that she could share with this woman, that regardless of her ancestry, she can start the chain and initiate spiritual energy by praying and doing mitzvahs for her progeny.

I think this message resonates loudly during these days of Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. One the one hand we do a lot of recalling the merits of our forefathers. At the same time, we should be mindful that our actions also hold immense powers to influence our offspring, current and future generations.

On Rosh Hashanah (and daily) we remember the binding of Yitschak by Avraham and call on this sacrifice as an everlasting merit that shields us and brings us blessing as direct descendants of Avraham.

Additionally, one of the meanings attached to the blowing of the Shofar is the connection between Shofar blowing and our receiving of the Torah at Mt. Sinai accompanied by the sounds of the blowing of the Shofar.

There is a parable from Rabbi Levi Yitzchak of Berditchev that gives context to our being judged on Rosh Hashana and what the Shofar contributes to clemency being granted:

A king was once traveling in the forest and lost his way, until he met a man who recognized that he was the king and escorted his master out of the forest and back to his palace. The king later rewarded him with many presents and elevated him to a powerful minister's post.

After a while, however, the man committed an act which was considered rebellious against the king, and he was sentenced to death. Before he was taken out to be executed, the king granted him one last request.

The man said: “I request to wear the clothes I wore when I escorted His Majesty when he was lost in the forest, and that His Majesty should also wear the clothes he wore then.”

The king complied, and when they were both dressed in the garments they wore at the time of their meeting, he said, “By your life, you have saved yourself,” and called off the execution.

The meaning of the parable is that when G-d gave the Torah to Israel, he offered it first to all the nations of the world. They all refused, except the people of Israel, who willingly accepted the yoke of Heaven and fulfilled the commandments of the Creator.

But now we have transgressed and rebelled, like the man in the parable, and with the arrival of the Day of Judgment we are fearful indeed. So we blow the shofar to recall the shofar blowing that accompanied our original acceptance of the Torah and coronation of G-d. This merit stands by us, and G-d forgives us all our sins and inscribes us immediately for a year of goodness and life.

The great deeds by our ancestors as they stood at Sinai 3337 years ago, stand us in good stead till this very day.

During these days of Teshuva when we focus on getting closer to Hashem, we have two modes. One is ‘steering away from bad’ i.e. not doing something that is anathema to Hashem’s divine will. 

This is often what we think about when we talk about ‘Teshuva’. Not speaking lashon hara. Not eating what we shouldn’t. Not violating Shabbat.

The other side of doing ‘Teshuva’ is about returning to Hashem via ‘doing good’. Fulfilling the instructions of the mitzvot that Hashem has commanded us to do. Donning Tefilin, lighting Shabbat candles, keeping kosher, family purity, mezuzah, Torah study etc. 

The most potent energies of closeness to Hashem are to be found in the fulfillment of the positive commandments. 

If we limit our observance to only not doing what is forbidden, we may as well have stayed in Heaven. Our souls in Heaven could not do anything wrong either. 

The great gift of creation and life is the proactive actions that we carry out. This highlights our ability to be partners with Hashem by doing actions that he has asked for. The mitzvot are G-d’s way of allowing us the epic gift of partnering with Him in creation. 

When we joyously and energetically do acts of connection to G-d we create a desire in our families and environments to connect to G-d via mitzvahs.

Especially when we talk about the effect it has on our children. 

And it doesn’t stop at the immediate effects on our children here and now. Nor is the impact limited to the near future.

Remember that by doing more Mitzvahs our deeds have a ripple effect and influence multiple generations of our offspring.

Just as we are still beneficiaries of the good deeds of our ancestors, our deeds will have an impact on our future progeny.

This makes an even more compelling case to expend every effort to do the best you can to do more mitzvahs and good actions.

May you be successful in the work of Teshuva, returning to Hashem and to your true self. Deep down at the core of our existence we yearn and crave connection with Hashem. Sometimes the outer layers of resistance need to be peeled away so that the inner core can take its rightfully central place in our life.

Yom Kippur is the day that the deepest quintessential spark of G-d which is at the epicenter of the neshama, comes out in a more revealed way.

We nurture it by refraining from food and drink and other bodily activities (Click here for a guide to observing Yom Kippur).

With blessing for a Shabbat Shalom and a Chatima uGmar Chatima Tova (to be signed into the books of a good year).

And much success in adding one or more positive mitzvahs to your life this year. 

Rabbi Yosef Kantor

It dawned on me as I read the following verse in Tehillim 124.

Our soul escaped like a bird from the hunters' snare; the snare broke, and we escaped.

It sounds wonderful to escape and be free to soar high like a bird.

But I wonder. 

If the trap indeed breaks, would we soar free like a bird or remain in our constricted zone as limiting as that may be.

There is a concept called the elephant mindset.

How is it that huge mighty elephants are tethered to their place with a paltry rope? Why doesn’t the elephant give a yank on the rope and break free?

Here is how it is explained.

At birth the elephant is held down by a rope tied to a peg in the ground. As much as it yanks and pulls, it cannot break free. At that tender age, the elephant is still rather weak. Once the beast grows up to be a strong and mighty creature that could easily break free, it no longer tries to break free. The elephant has learned in infancy that it is helpless against the strong rope. Although as we know, once an elephant is fully grown it would be impossible to hold him down without huge force.

It is called ‘learned helplessness’.

Is it possible that we too have fallen into the elephant trap?

Could it be that the ‘trap is broken’ but we have not escaped?

Let me give you an example of what I mean.

I recently met a Jewish man in his fifties, who told me very clearly that at the age of 8 he formed his relationship (or lack thereof) with religion.

Tragically his father passed away at a very young age, when he was but six years old. His grandmother who was a great influence in sculpting his personality, was a Jewishly observant woman. Yet, upon the tragic death of her son she was wont to say to her grandson ‘if there is a G-d how did he let this tragedy happen to your father’.

The young boy repeated this to his Hebrew school teacher one time too many and the teacher got exasperated. He sent him out of class and told him to go ask his grandmother and not burden him with sacrilegious complaints.

That rejection by his Hebrew school teacher was the end of the young boy’s relationship with organized Judaism.

I found all this out because after having a friendly conversation with him about his field of expertise in antique art, I offered him the opportunity to put on Tefillin. He rejected the offer. I saw there was something troubling him. When he saw that I genuinely wanted to learn more about him, he told me his story. 

As he grew up and matured he had many differing experiences that led him to recognize the unity within creation and the obvious presence of the One G-d. 

‘I now believe in G-d’ he told me, but not in the ‘organization’ and ‘politics’ of religion.

Clearly, he saw doing the mitzvah ritual of Tefillin as being part of an organized religion that had caused him emotional hurt as a small child.

Drawing on the theme I shared two weeks ago, I explained how the deed of a mitzvah is a stand alone act of expression of connection to G-d. It is the same act that was done since Exodus and is done in the exact same way by Jews the world over. 

Click her for my article about the mitzvah as the ultimate unifier of Jews.

After listening intently to what I explained, he said ‘thank you for sharing this perspective. Based on my new understanding,  I withdraw my previous rejection of your offer and would be willing to put on Tefilin’.

We then proceeded to lay tefillin for possibly the first time in his life.

Let us ponder this. 

At the tender age of 8, someone irresponsibly and tragically rejected this young boy from his Hebrew class. The young boy thought he was not wanted. He grew up since to be a very sophisticated man and an accomplished expert in his field. Yet, his relationship with Judaism remained ensnared in this early childhood experience.

In this case, the adult version of this young child was honest and authentic. I am awed by his courage to revisit what had become a personal ‘policy’. Once he realized that he could free himself of this childhood trauma he chose to escape and fly and connect to G-d through the mitzvah.

This is a story that repeats itself too often. Not always with the happy ending of become free.

It is indicative of our being caged and restricted in our own minds to things that have happened to us in our formative years.

Parents and teachers must pay more attention and realize their power and how impressionable young children are. If you tell a child ‘you are not good in mathematics just like I was not good’ it is almost guaranteed that the child will grow up not good in math.

On the other hand, your words have the power to self-fulfill in a positive way. Children whose parents believe in their ability to succeed, indeed succeed more in life.

Let us self-examine with the agenda of growth and not fall into the trap of blaming someone else for our own limitations. 

Yes, your parent, teacher, peer or society may have wronged you. But right now, you are exactly who you are. You are currently the sum total of everything G-d has given you that brought you to this day and to this state of being with these opportunities.

Look at yourself in the proverbial mirror and try to become the best version of you that you can be. So that you can contribute what G-d wants you to contribute to His world.

Don’t think disparagingly about yourself. Don’t look at yourself G-d forbid as a lost case. Recognize that with G-d’s help the ‘trap’ is broken and you can fly out and be free.

Even if you may have made mistakes, (and who hasn’t), Hashem gives us opportunities to pick ourselves up and return to Him.

That is the greatest gift that Hashem gives us. Teshuva. The ability to return and reframe the past as we rectify the present and future.

Let us not squander the opportunities that are available to us during this special and holy time period.

This year as we come closer to Rosh Hashana let us break free of our self-imposed limitations.

The trap is broken. The sky is the limit.

Take on a new mitzvah observance.

Schedule a Torah study regimen and master a book of Torah or Talmud.

Open your heart and wallet and help someone else in need.

Say nice and uplifting things to those around you.

Recognize the great kindness that the Almighty does for you and express your gratitude.

Spread your wings like a bird and soar into the beautiful blue sky dotted with serene white fluffy clouds.

Feel the nearness of Hashem, His love and adoration and surrender into His embrace.

Know and feel that Hashem believes in you and chooses and empowers you to be His emissary here on earth.

To bring the awareness of Hashem, morality, goodness and kindness to yourself, your family, your community and thus tilt the balance of the world for the good.

Sounds Messianic? It is. If we each do what we are empowered to dol, presto, Mashiach is here!

Amen.

Shabbat Shalom,

Shana Tova

Rabbi Yosef Kantor

I was in Singapore, attending a rabbinical conference of the Shluchim of Asia and was running a few minutes late to the opening session. 

Or so I thought. 

As I rushed through the security booth of the 150-year-old Maghain Aboth Synagogue on Waterloo St., I noticed a couple waiting to be admitted by the security guard. The wife Francine asked me in New York accented English if I was the rabbi from Thailand. I answered in the affirmative, wondering how she knew who I was. 

Francine told me the following story: 

‘We were touring Asia from NY nearly ten years ago. We had an unfortunate incident in Cambodia when my husband’s valuables were stolen. It put a damper on our spirits, and we were contemplating cutting our trip short and going home. The next leg of our journey took us through Bangkok, and we came to visit the shul. Your wife gave us a bowl of homemade soup, you helped my husband put on Tefillin, and we discussed the special mitzvahs that women are privileged to fulfill like the mitzvah of Mikva – family purity. Our spirits lifted, we continued with our trip as planned’.

‘Fast forward nearly ten years, we are now back in Asia for a tour, this time of Singapore region. How fortuitous it is to bump into you as we visit the local Synagogue’. 

We all stood there full of amazement at the incredible Divine Providence of meeting each other again.

It was so special to get the ‘hug’ from Heaven and the confirmation that we were in the right place at the right time. Being in Singapore, ‘running late’ to the meeting was exactly ‘on time’ for the rendezvous that G-d had planned for me.

Here is another incredible detail.

On Sunday of this week – the day that this meeting took place - we read the first portion of the Parsha of Ki Tavo.

The Torah instructs about the mitzvah of bringing the first fruits of one’s field to declare and proclaim thanks to G-d. The verse describes where the venue for bringing the ‘bikkurim’ (first fruits) was. 

‘You will go to the place that Hashem has chosen to rest His name there’. I.e. the Bet Hamikdash in Jerusalem.

The Baal Shem Tov gave the following interpretation to this verse.

"You shall go to the place the Eternal your G-d will choose" - a Jew must know that when he goes from one place to another, he is not going on his own, but is being directed from Above. And the intention and purpose in this is...

"...to cause His Name to dwell there" - that is, to make G-d known in his (that Jew's) locale

The Baal Shem Tov’s interpretation of this verse is broad and wide sweeping. 

Wherever we go, be it to reside there or just visit there, it is all programmed by Hashem.

The message is so relevant to us all, especially in our day and age where travel is so prevalent. Although we hop from city to city, country to country and continent to continent much more than we have ever done in history, the inspiring message of the Torah is still authentic and current.

We don’t just happen to land up somewhere as a random coincidence. 

Rather we believe that we have a Divine mission in the place that we have been ‘sent’ to. 

True, we may think we know why we have chosen to go to a particular locale. Perhaps for business. Or sightseeing. But there is really a deeper narrative. A Divine purpose that is at the heart of our journey.

The purpose is to spread awareness of G-d. To do another mitzvah. To do a favor for a fellow (which is the greatest mitzvah of all), or to make a blessing of thanksgiving to G-d for a food or drink that you are blessed to enjoy. 

Click here for an inspirational thought on this.

How uplifting it was, on that very day when we read that Torah portion, to have an experience that matched the teaching so precisely.

Indeed, we met and talked about getting more connected to G-d. About mitzvahs that we could add. 

Picking up on our discussion about Mikva from nearly a decade ago, I was excited to share a new angle about Mikva. 

I had just been listening to the Rebbe’s public talks in 1975 exactly 50 years ago, as he launched the family purity campaign. 

The Rebbe addressed an often-overlooked demographic—older women who had already reached menopause. They too, he urged, should be encouraged to observe the laws of Taharat Hamishpachah. 

When a woman is younger and experiencing her regular monthly cycle, the mitzvah of Mikvah becomes a consistent part of life — a rhythm of holiness that repeats month after month. But this isn’t just a ritual. It’s a powerful opportunity for renewal — in the marriage, in the emotional connection, and in the soul.

Each time a woman immerses in the Mikvah, she brings freshness and excitement into the relationship. It’s like hitting the “reset” button — not just physically, but spiritually. It’s no exaggeration to say that it allows husband and wife to feel like a bride and groom all over again, with that same spark, that same anticipation, and that same joy.

By observing the laws of Taharat HaMishpacha, the couple isn’t just following rules — they are inviting Hashem into their home, into their lives, and yes, even into their bedroom. That’s what makes a Jewish marriage not only loving, but holy. It transforms the physical into something divine. It brings G-dly light into the deepest places of the relationship.

Once menopause is reached immersion in the Mikva is done once after the last period. This one-time immersion sanctifies the rest of the couple’s marriage and is retroactively spiritually beneficial for her marriage and her children.

We made plans for Francine and Nechama to follow up to coordinate fulfilling this mitzvah. 

Click here for more info, or click here to contact Nechama.

And with the husband, of course I wrapped tefillin.

Most of all we both ‘kvelled’ and reveled as we celebrated the Divinity of the moment.

Hey, where are you now? 

Somewhere you want to be? Or do you have no idea why you landed up where you are.

Wherever it is you may be, know that Hashem has brought you there for reasons known to Him.

Best wishes to you to uncover that deeper reason.

Shana Tova Umetuka

Shabbat Shalom

Rabbi Yosef Kantor