By the Grace of G-d
Dear Friend,
This note by my colleague Mendy Kaminker summed up my instinctive feelings last week upon hearing about the tragic disaster in Meron on Lag Baomer.
I want someone to blame.
Someone that I can look at
Scream at until I am blue in my face
It's all because of you
That little children do not have a father to kiss
And loving mothers will have to kiss their child one last goodbye.
Or maybe, I don't want anyone to blame.
But give me a link.
A link to donate
To do something
To try to ease the pain of those families
It's just so unbearable
I want to do something.
Or a name of a Rabbi.
A great Torah scholar.
I want to ask him:
“How can that be? On the holy day of Lag BaOmer!?”
I want him to give me a beautiful quote from the Talmud
To make sense of it all.
But no.
I don't want anyone to blame.
And don't give me the name of the rabbi.
And please send me the link to donate soon.
Not now.
Now, I just want to lift my eyes to the sky
And let them fill with tears.
The raw pain
The acceptance that all is in His hands.
For now
We are just one family
One nation
In mourning.
18 Iyar 5781
Mendy Kaminker
Chabad.org
Now it’s already one week later…. it is still very hard to write.
So let me be silent.
Together with you.
Does it make sense for me to write to you that I want to be silent?
If I want to be silent, perhaps I should just not write.
When we were growing up in Australia our mother insisted that we periodically write letters to our grandparents in America.
I remember, on more than one occasion, sitting with pen and paper and whining ‘Mommy, I don’t know what to write’.
My mother would respond ‘write to Zaidy and Bobby that you don’t know what to write’.
In my childish eyes this seemed quite unreasonable. To share with them the non-news that I had nothing to write didn’t seem newsworthy enough to warrant sending a letter.
Of course, as all you adults reading this article understand, it was the connection with our grandparents that my mother was seeking to instill. For the purpose of building the relationship with our grandparents it was definitely ok to write that we didn’t have what to write. As long as we communicated with them.
I don’t know what to write regarding the tragic deaths of forty-five of our fellow Jews at the celebration of Lag Baomer in Meron.
But it is a catastrophic event that cannot be ignored.
(Clearly, the government agencies responsible for events like these as well as civilian professionals in crowd control and event planning need to study what went wrong and fix it IMMEDIATLEY. Something went tragically wrong, and lessons need to be learned and implemented swiftly and decisively. This is the job of government and civil servants).
No words can ever describe the inconsolable pain of the loss of loved ones.
But I want to go join with you. To huddle together during this painful period. So I am writing to you. A letter of ‘silence’.
In a way, by being silent, I am following a precedent set 3,333 years ago in the Torah.
The Jewish people were gathered for the grand finale of the first stage of the inauguration of the Temple (Mishkan) in the desert. In the height of the dazzling joy, as the entire people was rejoicing, the two older sons of Aharon offered a too rapturous sacrifice and G-d took their lives. They passed away.
‘Aharon was silent’ says the Torah.
The reaction of ‘Aharon was silent’ has forever after been a model that is followed when something as unexplainable as the death of his two sons in the height of their holy celebration occurs.
Silence in the face of tragedy is an acknowledgment that the pain and inexplicableness of the disaster are so overwhelming that it cannot be soothed by words. Nor can it be rationalized by logical explanations.
The silence is accompanied by a deep unshakeable faith in G-d.
Aharon knew in the very depth of his soul that it was G-d who had taken his sons.
Yet his relationship with G-d was intact. Aharon knew that he could in no way expect to understand why G-d had done what He had done.
‘Aharon was silent’.
And at the same time Aharon continued his holy work.
Notwithstanding his terrible and painful loss, Aharon continued in his role as the High Priest in the Mishkan.
This too, the continuing of the holy mission of living a productive life after tragedy, has been the template of the Jewish people ever since.
With all the pain and anguish, Jewish observance and productivity continue even when we don’t have the answers as to ‘why bad things happen to good people’.
For while we don’t know ‘why’ G-d allows painful things to happen, we do know ‘what’ we must do in their wake.
What we must do in the aftermath of such a tragedy, where so many precious ‘lights’ have been snuffed out, is create more ‘light’. The pent-up emotions of frustration and feelings of unfairness should be harnessed and redirected towards creating a change for the better in the world.
The souls of the deceased will have no benefit from our falling into immobilizing depression. On the contrary. They beg us to carry on what they can no longer do. Imbue this world with more holiness by doing acts of goodness and kindness.
On a practical note: Here is a link to a website that is collecting ‘Mitzvot’ ‘points of light’ being committed in memory of the deceased.
Take on a mitzvah in memory of the victims and turn your emotion into tangible acts of goodness thus transforming the world.
*****
To my dear Jewish community members in Thailand.
During these days and weeks things are challenging.
There is a sense of hopelessness.
Vaccination program is very behind.
Hospital availability is an issue.
Many citizens of countries like Israel, USA and Europe, that have vaccinations readily available have traveled abroad to be vaccinated.
This is definitely something to be considered as in many home countries it is quite simple for citizens to get vaccines.
Yet, at the same time I know that there are many who are unable to travel to their home countries where they would be eligible to be vaccinated.
It is scary. For older people in particular. May G-d protect them.
To enhance the G-dly protection we seek, let us remember that Hashem is at the helm of this ship. He and only He is in charge of every microbe. Yes, He instructs us to take every precaution that we can to protect ourselves from being infected. But there is nothing to gain from panicking. And the absolute truth remains, that it is solely the Almighty who directs every single germ and microbe.
This is a time to strengthen our belief and faith and trust in the Almighty. The joy and tranquility that comes with faith, is helpful medically as well.
I would like to suggest that you take a look at this website called www.gateoftrust.org whose stated objective is:
Helping people live more tranquil and meaningful lives by learning and experiencing authentic trust in G-d.
There are wonderful lectures and resources for studying about trust in Hashem.
May we all be blessed with good health, and may the Almighty bring us the ultimate good, the coming of Mashiach speedily, AMEN.
Shabbat Shalom
Rabbi Yosef Kantor
PS If there is any way I can help, please let me know.